How Brené Brown’s Two-Word Check-Ins Boost Team Engagement and Leadership

Last month at PCMA Convening Leaders in Houston, Texas I had the privilege of sitting down with the extraordinary Brené Brown. For years, I’ve admired her work—her books sit dog-eared on my shelf, and her research and philosophies around vulnerability, courage, and connection have shaped how I lead.

One idea from our conversation, in particular, has stayed with me, and it’s something Brené shared when I asked her this question: What’s one habit leaders can adopt this year to embody daring leadership?

Her answer was a simple one: two-word check-ins.

Brené shared that something she’s instituted in her own team’s meetings is starting with two-word check-ins—a quick round where everyone shares how they’re feeling at that moment. Maybe it’s “energised and focused.” or perhaps it’s “exhausted and flat” or whatever it is, it gets named and importantly (particularly in the case of a comment like the latter) the leader makes a point of thanking the person for their honesty.

As Brené put it: “What you bring to the meeting is what’s permitted in the meeting.”

In other words, if a leader doesn’t create space to acknowledge people’s feelings, those emotions don’t magically evaporate. Equally, as a leader do you think not being aware that some of your team are perhaps feeling overwhelmed or drained helps performance? Of course it doesn’t. They simmer below the surface, influencing how we show up, how we collaborate, and, ultimately, how we perform.

However, If we create the safety to allow the information to flow on the other hand, we have the ability to do something about it.

And that’s the crucial second step.

If someone shares something like “overwhelmed and drained,” Brené makes a point to follow up after the meeting, saying: “What does support from me look like today?” From there, she and the person work together to problem-solve, finding a solution that’s both actionable and meaningful.

It’s deceptively simple, yet radical in its impact.

The Fallacy of Ignoring Feelings

If someone on your team feels exhausted, deflated, or overwhelmed—and you don’t know about it—you’re not leading; you’re guessing. It perpetuates the fallacy that productivity and collaboration can thrive without considering how people truly feel. Spoiler alert: they can’t.

Let’s be honest: We’ve all been in meetings where the unspoken energy in the room is heavier than a lead balloon. And yet, how often do we push through, pretending it’s business as usual? Ignoring that energy doesn’t just stifle the meeting—it erodes trust, creativity, and connection over time.

Asking Better Questions

Here’s what Brené’s two-word check-ins force us to confront:

• Are you paying attention to the human beings behind the job titles?
• Are you creating space for people to speak their truth—or just pushing for results at any cost?
• And most importantly, are you brave enough to ask your team what they actually need—and then act on it?

As Brené put it, as leaders:

“It’s not your responsibility to figure out what your team needs—but it is your responsibility to ask.”

Why This Matters (And the Science to Prove It)

Brené’s two-word check-in practice isn’t just touchy-feely leadership fluff; it’s rooted in research and results. And if you’re a leader thinking, “Do we really have time for this in meetings?”—the data says you don’t have time not to.

1. High-trust teams are high-performing teams: Google’s Project Aristotle reveals that the #1 factor behind high-performing teams is psychological safety—the belief that team members feel safe to take risks, speak up, and show vulnerability without fear of judgment or punishment. Two-word check-ins are a simple yet powerful way to foster psychological safety,  creating space for people to be honest about where they are mentally and emotionally.
   
2. Engagement starts with feeling seen: According to Gallup, one of the biggest drivers of engagement is whether employees feel valued as people. Two-word check-ins say, “I see you. I hear you. You matter.” And, engaged employees are 17% more productive than companies with a disengaged workforce and have 21% more profitability. Creating moments of connection doesn’t just build relationships—it drives results.
   
3. Empathy reduces burnout: Research published in HBR shows that leaders who demonstrate empathy—by asking how employees are feeling and offering support—significantly reduce burnout among their teams. And this couldn’t be more urgent. Burnout rates are soaring: Mercer’s 2024 Global Talent Trends Report found that a staggering 82% of employees are at risk of burnout. Small acts of empathy, like asking “What does help from me look like today?” can make a huge difference in reducing stress and improving wellbeing.

So, here’s my challenge to you: What are you doing to check in with your team—not just on their work, but on how they’re really doing?

Because when you dare to ask and lead with curiosity and empathy, you’re not just building better teams—you’re embodying daring leadership.

I’d love to hear your thoughts: How will you use this habit to lead more intentionally in 2025?

Loved this article? Then you’ll love Love Mondays.

Join the Love Mondays community and receive a short and sweet leadership lesson and mini activation challenge in your inbox each week – the Monday morning kick in the pants you’ve been looking for!